by Rose McClement

Hello All!

Yes, we have seriously been Missing-in-Action, well, from our social media platforms anyway! We have been active, but as previously said, sometimes the ‘pause button’ had to be hit. Running a design project and keeping up with social media at the same time gets to be a challenge. At times, one of them has to take a backseat. I’m guessing you know which one that has been. 

When things get quieter on the design project front, we find it very difficult to get back on the social media ‘horse’ again. I’m sure you know that feeling. It feels like a malaise. The talk in the head goes something like this: “I really would like to get a post out again. I feel I should. It is a marketing tool after all and it has been neglected. One is not supposed to neglect your marketing! And, some peeps have so faithfully supported and followed us all these years since 2011”. 

Then, the guilt sets in and that sounds something like this: “Oh gosh, I feel so bad about not having written anything for the longest time. How am I going to show my face in public again?” The evitable next step in the process is Procrastination, followed by the final stage… “going into hiding”. I just hide away and pretend like nothing has happened.

Well, I don’t know about Marica – but I went through all those stages/processes until I finally found the energy to be honest with myself, be kind to myself, and admit that I was in hiding. It was time to come outta hiding and come clean.

Yet that said, the ‘pause button’ still wasn’t released at that point. I felt I still had to work through the messy bits that had held me in hiding. It called for a bit of introspection, which is something that I am so familiar with. I am all about personal expansion and growth. It’s big for me. So, I asked myself: Why the Guilt? Why the Procrastination? Why the hiding away?  

As I began to own this stuff, it became clear to me that all the imperatives of ‘Should, Must, Shouldn’t, etc’ are all voices that I had ‘subcontracted’ to (I stole that term from a very good business coach, Iva Polackova). I had bought into all the ‘rules’; all the ‘dos and don’ts’ attached to social media marketing. It is constantly being drip-fed into our minds. And, unsurprisingly, when I wasn’t able to pull it off at those ‘standards’, the Guilt set in. Followed in rapid succession by its cousins: Shame, Procrastination, and Denial. It felt as if I had failed at marketing our company. Design Monarchy, our fine Interiors company, was left to perish in the ‘trenches’. That is what it felt like to me. It was painful actually.

I then began to question the drip-fed information and ‘rules’ that prompted these rather nasty feelings! 

Whose voice was that?

Who does that voice belong to?

Me?

I don’t think so! 

After the introspection, I am now more than happy to admit that these ‘rules & standards’ don’t sit well with me. Being so regulated lacks total authenticity. It lacks spontaneity. It is totally inflexible. So, it wasn’t my authentic voice I was following.

For me, ‘the rules’ are just another pressure to perform that I took on board. It robbed social media posts of all the fun, pleasure, and joy that we derive from sharing our passion. It is such a bad fit for me.

AND THAT, methinks, is the real cause of my underlying, subconscious resistance. The resistance manifested as avoidance and looking for excuses not to get involved. Something like the little girl who was standing in the seat of the car. Her mom told her to sit down and buckle up. She resisted and had to be told two or three times. Then, she sat down and said, “Mommy I am sitting, but in my heart, I am still standing!” The inner Voice that comes up as Resistance. I was, to put it in a good South African truism, ‘GATVOL’. You can feel guilty and gatvol at the same time I discovered.

Introspection made me shed some of those unwanted skins. In releasing guilt and its cousins, I can once again enjoy being active on social media. 

AND, the ‘pause button’ has now been officially decompressed and released. We have pressed PLAY… WE ARE BACK!

In terms of how regularly we post, what we post, etc. is something that is being left pretty open-ended. No ‘Should’ or ‘Have’ to or ‘Must’ is going to set the pace this time round. Instead, I look forward to Inspired Action. It is more authentic and true to us.

I do hope that you join us or continue with us.

Ciao,